Tag: mindset

Not that long ago, a close friend betrayed me.

Lina Irawan

This person treated me cruelly. They took advantage of my generosity, wasted my time, and accused me of things that weren’t true. The whole thing left me feeling saddened, disappointed, and emotionally drained. My self-righteous first instinct was to play the victim. I wanted to convince this person they were wrong—to make them see how they hurt me, to force an apology, to somehow fix the relationship by changing them. Silly me. Trying to change someone is rarely loving. More often, it’s control cloaked in concern. And the need to…

Read More

The Pope vs. Silicon Valley

Neng Nana

Last fall, the Notre Dame philosopher, Meghan Sullivan, participated in a closed-door meeting at the Vatican. She was there to discuss AI ethics with a group of religious thinkers, academics, and leading members of the technology industry. As Sullivan recalls in ​a recent newsletter​, she attended an optional Catholic Mass the first morning, held in an ancient church. She was surprised to see one of the tech leaders sitting a few rows away in the pews. “[This was] the kind of guy you typically see in a black t-shirt and…

Read More

How to Stop Daydreaming: 2 Small Ways to Start Living the Life You Truly Want

Siti Muinah

“The distance is nothing; it is only the first step that is difficult.†Madame Marie du Deffand “What is not started today is never finished tomorrow.†Johann Wolfgang von Goethe “Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.†Earl Nightingale Maybe the most common issue people have with personal development and making a positive change is that it stays a daydream. That they get excited and inspired. But then as those positive emotions fade nothing really…

Read More

How To Master Hydration with the Water Cures Protocol

Nila Kartika Wati

“I believe that water is the only drink for a wise man.†— Henry David Thoreau I find it one of the great ironies of modern life that we have to learn “skills†for the things we were born to do. Like breathing air and drinking water. Most people are “water-logged†but dehydrated at a cellular level. You can drink a gallon of water a day and still feel sluggish if that water never enters your cells. Mastering hydration ensures every drop reaches your “inner ocean.†By leveraging the biological…

Read More

Why I Don’t Care About Being Popular Anymore

Lina Irawan

In middle school, being popular felt like the most important thing in the world. I just wanted to fit in and be liked. I tried so hard to impress the “cool kids†and obsessed over my social media followers. But pursuing popularity made me utterly miserable. I had low self-esteem and based my worth on external validation. I posted endless photos and memes seeking compliments and filtered my true self. I changed how I dressed, talked and acted to gain approval from others. But inside, I felt like a fraud.…

Read More

How To Handle Conflict: 7 Secrets From History’s Master Strategist

Neng Nana

Work conflict. Relationship conflict. Family conflict. Conflict is everywhere and I’ll be honest with you: I’m kinda tired of it. So what are we gonna do? Well, today we’re gonna get some help from what may seem like an unlikely source: Carl von Clausewitz. Yeah, the dead war guy. The 19th-century Prussian strategist who spent his time thinking about armies and violence, which sounds like it has nothing to do with you, a person whose most frequent combat scenarios involve passive-aggressive emails. But the dead war guy is useful. Not…

Read More

What Letting My Dad Go Taught Me About Love

Laily UPN

“Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.†~Hermann Hesse My dad was intubated, so he couldn’t say the words back to me. I told him I loved him anyway. Instead, he slowly pointed to himself and then to me. “You love me too?†I asked. His eyes widened ever so slightly, and he nodded gently, giving me the biggest response his body could offer. I held onto that moment like it was something solid in a room where everything else was slipping…

Read More

Self-Discipline at Midlife: The Recovery Loop That Beats the Willpower Model

Raul Delapena Setiawan

Self-discipline isn’t a trait. It’s not a muscle you build. It’s not a streak you keep. It’s a recovery loop: the cadence of returning to the practice after you miss. If you’ve been searching “how to build self-discipline” for fifteen years and keep arriving at the same answer (more willpower, better routines, fewer distractions), you already suspect the model is wrong. It is. Here’s the one that works at midlife: a 90-second practice you can do on the worst Wednesday of your life, because the worst Wednesday is when self-discipline…

Read More

My 2019 Annual Review

Siti Muinah

Another year complete. Here’s a quick recap of 2019, which also happened to be one of the craziest years of my life. As always, this Annual Review will answer three questions. Before we begin, it is worth noting that every Annual Review is a personal process. This is simply an overview of what my year looked like, not advice for how you should live your life. (That said, you are always welcome to use this general format for your own Annual Review.) 1. What went well this year? I had…

Read More